“Why do you do these?” “What?” “What you are doing right now!” “You know you can be like them.” “You know you can choose the easy way out, simplify things, and life would still be good.” That was a conversation that ran in my mind about two weeks ago, while stuck in traffic at around 10:00pm along Thika road. I was coming from a place called Njoro, where I had gone to get stock for my business. So here I was, in a lorry, observing the cars driving by, and just thinking that most of those people were actually going home to rest, but there I was in a truck full of ply woods and block boards that had to be offloaded the same night.
To cut the long story short, we finished offloading at around midnight and I made it to the house slightly before 1:00am. I was not even feeling sleepy; all I wanted was to think; think through my life; everything that I was going through, and most important, the choices that I was making, which at the end of the day, were constantly defining me. This was quite unlike of a person who had woken up at 4:00 am on the prior day and had spent the whole day running up and down at a factory, trying to ensure that he had got the right quantity of the products that he needed. But I knew that could not go on; I had to force myself to find some sleep for I had an early customer coming in the following day, which meant I had only a few hours of sleep at my disposal…
Over the past few months, I have had some very interesting times- probably the most interesting times of my life. I have spent more time than I had ever spent there before, interacting with men and women that I greatly worship, and in the process learned a lot from them and their lifestyles, making me feel more equipped for life, than I have ever felt. I have had a chance to walk with them as they run through their days, and it’s amazing to see how they stick to purpose and reason as they work on getting the best value out of themselves. We have laughed over many cups of tea, as I asked them questions about their lifestyle, all in the need to see through their lenses and understand the purpose behind their cause.
I have also had a chance to read and reread the best materials that I feel define a man the best way possible--- that is--- Atlas Shrugged and The Fountainhead. Prior to the two books-experiences, I used to have a lot of questions ranging from religion to man’s place in his own life, and most of all, I had the answers to all these questions, but lacked enough confidence to speak out or even walk these answers. But not anymore! The experience I have had while reading these two books, is like looking yourself in the mirror, and seeing a person you’re sure is not you, but speaks like you. I have heard my own voice voiced out in Ayn’s characters (the writer of the two books), and for once, I felt that someone had explained it all to me, on whom I am. Make no mistake, I have known whom I am for a long time, I just didn’t understand it, and at many times tried to fit in with the people considered normal. Before you start thinking that I am talking of being psycho, let me explain a little bit about the two books. First, they are like bibles to the atheist; but not just any atheist, but the objectivist man--- this is because Ayn’s work is written for the glory of man, to himself, for himself, and for his life within earth. Second, we have all heard the terms egoism, pride and selfishness, but we have only heard these words, or used them, to imply negativity. What most of us do not know is that these words--- when properly understood, and used--- are the ones that lead to “the glory of man, to himself, for himself, and for his life within earth.
In the process of all these, and the main thing being to live life, I have made quite a number of mistakes; actually big mistakes. I have made some poor investment choices that have really tossed me down. I have put my money in the wrong baskets, and just watched it blow away, with tough lessons as the only remainder. I have been floored down by misplaced love ---misplaced because I knew it could not work out, but still pushed it. At the end of the day, focus is the key of the game, and moreover, it has to be the right-rational chosen and approved game, by none other, but oneself.
One more thing has been cooking up; I came to the door step of the most glorious place that a man can find himself; serenity! Probably influenced by the many good and bad events that have been taking place in my life, I have found myself more than ever in a zone where leading a quiet life and being reflective is the in-thing. Some of my readers even noticed and asked me, why my blog is no longer updated at the rate it used to be there before. To the contrary, I have had further more and better experiences, adventures and moments to write on, than there before, but just didn’t feel like putting them out here. I felt it was a time for me – me time, they call it- to focus in rhyming with the groove of my moments, to just enjoy those precious times of the zone, to listen more to myself and my surroundings -to suck out energy out of it-. Well, I blame it on spending too much time with old men who have made it all, but understand and have modesty as their best attire. So I am following up in their footsteps, it is not easy, but I like it. Moreover, it is fantastic to walk in another man’s shoes -that I can assure you.
